ALLURA'S NEW GROOVE - PART 12

“All right, gentlemen, this is it. Fall in for inspection.” I turn to examine the ranks. Everyone is dressed in a featureless, one-piece black jumpsuit, black boots and goggles. If it weren’t for the brightly-colored Super-Soakers, we’d look like a bunch of stealth commandos. I turn to Lance. “Relay the plan.”

“Gotcha, Dexter.” Lance salutes me and breaks rank to turn and address the others. “All right, guys, here’s the skinny. Alan has supplied us with the location of the Vixen Brigade’s HQ. They’re currently holed up in Lynne’s apartment.” He walks over to a large map showing the layout of the condo’s fifth floor. “Pidge and Galen have retrieved the layout of the condo and all the access points are marked in red. We’ll break up into two two-man units and one single to cover the elevator, the main and the secondary stairwells. Hunk, you and Dunkirk are to establish a rescue point near the perimeter of the swimming pool. Then you are to approach the apartment along the outside of the building using your climbing equipment. Maintain a holding position on the patio. When all three of the internal units have met in the corridor of the apartment, we’ll break in and create a distraction while the two of you enter from your position, locate Keith and return him to the rescue point.” He looks at me. “Anything to add, Captain?”

“Just remember, fellows, who we’re dealing with. You’ve already seen what they’re capable of. Proceed with extreme caution at all times during this mission. Let’s do it. Team dismissed.”

It’s funny how time distorts according to one’s perceptions. I’ve been working on getting free from these cuffs for a good two minutes, but it seems like it’s been an hour or more. I guess that’s due to the sheer amount of concentration I’ve been pouring into the task at hand. I have got to get out of these handcuffs and out of this room, no ifs, ands or buts about it. The little demon Keith roaming around in my head is taunting me with images of Allura in that blue babydoll. I cannot be here when she comes back.

Damn it, cut that out, I yell inwardly at myself as I strain to work a hand loose. Just one is all I need. It’s taking forever to get the ring of metal past the joint of my left thumb, but once I do I’m home free.

Allura has given up her search for a spray bottle in the bathroom and is conversing with Lynne in the hall outside the bedroom. I hear Lynne say something about ironing and wrinkles and then her footsteps recede into distance. I hear the doorknob turn and I bring my hands down quick. Allura pokes her head around the door to smile at me.

“We’re in luck - Lynne says she has a spray bottle. She uses it to mist her clothes while ironing.”

“That’s wonderful. I can hardly wait.”

She gets such a happy smile that I almost regret having to deceive her. “Neither can I. Just hang on.” She pulls the door shut, and I begin to work on the cuffs once more.

‘You know,’ the demon Keith says in my head, ‘all she wants to do is give you a hummer. How bad can that be, really? According to a former American president, it’s not real sex anyway.’

‘Don’t listen to that drivel,’ warns the angel Keith, who has been encouraging my escape this entire time. ‘A moment’s passion could undo years of caring friendship. She is the one you serve with loyalty and dedication. You mustn’t cheapen that relationship.’

‘You wanna talk about relationship? What about the relationship of that sweet little body of hers rubbing against yours, huh? The gentle swell of her breasts pressing against your chest, her nipples brushing your skin like soft fingertips...’

‘Temptation always has an appeal, or people wouldn’t fall to it so easily. You must put those experiences far, far from your mind and think of the terrible consequences that will certainly follow should you give in to such base desires.’

‘Consequences, shmonsequences. How about that bit with the chocolate syrup, eh? Liked that tongue of hers tickling your belly, didn’t you? You liked it, you loved it, you want more of it. Admit it. Confession is supposed to be good for the soul, right?’

‘Not that sort of confession.’

‘Ahh, go pose for a Hallmark card, why don’t you?’

One more tug, and the cuff is loose. The little demon Keith growls his disapproval and vanishes. I spring up from the bed and look around. The only other exit besides the bedroom door is through the windows, and that would result in a five-story drop to the pavement below. Not good. Then a thought hits me and I hurry over to open the windows, snatch the curtains aside and duck into the closet. I hear the bedroom door open an instant later. I open the closet door just a crack to watch.

“Keith...?” Allura pauses by the bed, looking confused. Then she spies the open windows and goes over to poke her head out. She slams the spray bottle down on the dresser nearby and races back to the bedroom door to fling it open.

“Shannon, Lynne!” She cries. “The prisoner has escaped!” She rushes back over to the window. Tasia, Shannon and Lynne enter the room a moment later. Shannon doesn’t look convinced.

“There aren’t any real handholds out there for him to climb with.” She taps her chin with a finger. “I wonder if...” She looks in my direction and heads for the closet. I draw a couple of deep breaths to prepare myself. The only thing I have left going for me is the element of surprise. I have to take full advantage of it.

Shannon turns the doorknob slowly, then she yanks the door open. I hesitate in the shadows for a full two seconds, then I leap out and yell ‘Boo!’ at the top of my lungs. Shannon shrieks and leaps back, as do Tasia and Lynne. I sprint for the door and get a split second of head start before they recover and start to chase after me. Lynne yells for reinforcements as I dash down the hall.

Caro, Leila, Desiree and Camille are still sprawled on cushions on the living room floor. They all look up as I enter the room, and Desi snags my ankle as I run past them but I’ve got too much momentum for her to keep hold of it. Unfortunately it slows me down enough for Caro to make a grab at my towel. She latches on with both hands just as I get hold of the door leading to the outside hallway. But I’m past the point of rejection and I can’t stop now. I rush through the door and slam it shut behind me, leaving my last shred of modesty behind. I dash down the hall and around the corner, officially becoming the condo’s first streaker.

“I have stress, I have stress, I have stress...” I mutter aloud as I run.

“He got away, Shanny,” Caro announces as we rush into the living room, “but not entirely.” She waves the towel with an impish grin. Allura looks at the towel, looks around at the rest of us, then she gets this pout that’s nothing short of pitiful.

“I’m not going to get my practice,” she declares in a mournful voice. “Bummer.”

“You just hang on to your chocolate syrup, Ally,” Tasia replies. “You’ll be using it soon. The fat lady ain’t singing yet.”

Allura looks confused. “What’s Nanny got to do with this?”

Tasia blinks. “Umm...”

“Come on, girls, before he gets too big of a head start.” Lynne shrugs a robe onto her shoulders as she sprints through the door. Caro hands Allura the towel to hang onto and the rest of us rush after Lynne.

“Group Leader to Unit One, report.”

“Unit One here. Lance and I are on the south stairwell and climbing, Captain.”

“Roger that. Unit Two?”

“Unit Two is at level three and on the up and up - shut up, Galen, that wasn’t funny.”

“Umm, Roger, I suppose. Unit Three?”

“Unit Three here, Captain. We got th’ safe area established an’ we’re about t’ make th’ - hang on, Hunk’s spotted somethin’ goin’ on at a fifth floor window. Looks like someone’s gone an’ opened it, but he didna see who it was...an’ that’s our target area, he says.”

“All right. Attention all units, let’s double-time it! See you all on level five.”

I apologize to the large potted plant that’s been forced to donate some of its larger leaves so I can cover up. I have to be a creative with finding a way to wrap the greenery around my hips. Once I’m sure it won’t fall off I continue my retreat down the hall.

I heard the girls searching the area not so long ago, but now things are quiet. That’s got me worried. They could be trying to take a roundabout path to outflank me. But I absolutely cannot, will not be put in a bedroom alone with Allura. Dunkirk thinks he has a problem with his male tendencies? Humph. Let him wind up in alone in a room with Lynne and a bottle of chocolate syrup and see what he does then. Then again, Lynne isn’t a princess. He’d have to answer to her parents, but after that things would smooth themselves out. Definitely not the same situation.

I reach the south stairwell and I’m about to open the door when I hear footsteps coming up the stairs. Just as I thought - they went one floor down, crossed to this stairwell and now they’re coming back up. I cast a quick look up and down the hall. Nowhere to hide. Looks like I’m going to have to play a little rough, then. I know how to apply a throwing technique without hurting the recipient. They’ll get a few bumps out of it, but that’ll be it. I flatten against the wall on the opening side of the door and wait.

Alan pauses at the top of the stairwell and turns to me. “Cover me, Lance, I’m going in.”

I give him a thumbs-up and prime my Super-Soaker. Alan turns the doorknob slowly as I move into position to provide covering fire. He yanks the door open and steps through, then he’s suddenly pulled to the right. I rush through the door and find him being attacked by a deranged jungle man. No, wait, that’s -

“Keith?” I lower the water gun. Keith lets go of Alan and turns to face me.

“Lance. Am I glad to see you.” He gives me a smile of relief. I smile back because of how damned silly he looks. He glances down at himself and gives us an embarrassed grin. “I can explain.”

“I bet.” I gesture toward the leaves he’s wearing. “Nice outfit, who’s your gardener?”

“I thought this was a pretty good improvisation, considering what I had to work with. Does it really look that bad?”

“You look like a reject from a Survivor casting call.”

“Thanks.”

“Welcome, Cap’n.” Then I notice the gunk smeared on his stomach. I drag a finger across the brown smudge and rub the sticky stuff between finger and thumb.

“What the heck is this you’ve got on you?” I take a sniff at it. “Chocolate syrup? Where did this come from?”

Keith purses his lips and fidgets a little. “Umm, it’s, I...it’s complicated, okay? Let’s leave it at that.”

“So explain already. I think I have a right to know if my theory on dessert toppings was correct or not.”

Keith gets a serious case of the blushes, all over his body. I could paint some white stripes on him right now and everyone would think he was wearing his old jumpsuit. “Ahh...it’s a long story, and I don’t know if I have the time to tell it.”

“You can tell us as we make our retreat,” Alan offers. Keith gives him one of those Voltron-eyebeam kind of glares.

“I suppose I could, Alan, but I’m not going to.”

Alan either doesn’t get the hint, or he’s ignoring it entirely. “Dexter said you were kidnapped out of the locker room. It has something to do with how you lost the towel, doesn’t it?”

Keith glances in my direction but he knows he’s not getting any help on this end. He folds his arms and frowns at Alan. “We’re not discussing this...”

“Allura?” Alan arches an eyebrow. “Did Allura take your towel?”

Keith heaves a big sigh and takes a moment to compose himself. “No. Caro took it.”

“So she’s the one who also used the chocolate syrup then, I take it.”

“No! The loss of the towel and the application of the chocolate syrup are two separate instances, and - and that’s all I have to say about it. Period. You got that?”

Alan shrugs and rubs at his chin thoughtfully, his tone casual. “Yessir. Whatever you say, Sir. I guess you can save it all for the de-leafing - umm, make that debriefing - no, wait - dissemination of the facts. Sorry.” He doesn’t even crack a smile when he’s finished. That just makes his delivery all the more hilarious. I bust out laughing and have to back up to the wall to keep from falling over. Keith fumes in silence as Alan unclips his radio and opens the channel to Dexter.

“Unit Two to Unit Leader, Unit Two to Unit Leader. We’ve found the hostage, repeat, we’ve found the hostage.”

“Roger, Unit Two. Withdraw from the building proper. I’ll tell the others that the mission is complete.”

Keith arches an eyebrow. “Dexter set up a rescue mission?”

“Yessir,” Alan replies. “He thought it might provide a good training experience, as well as helping you to keep your virtue intact.” Again his remark is dead serious, not even the slightest upturn of the lips, and again Keith responds with a clenching of his jaw and no reply. My stomach tightens so hard from my laughter that it aches. I think I like Alan after all. I really do.

Keith regains his composure once again and holds out his hand for Alan’s radio. “Here, let me have that for a second...Dexter, this is Keith. Listen, since we’re already here and the whole idea was to find the princess and take her back to the castle in the first place, I want you all to hold your positions. I’m taking a detour to get some clothes, then we’re going to regroup and get Allura.”

“Roger, Captain-Captain. I’ll be standing by for your next orders…clothes?”

“Never mind, I’ll explain later.” Keith hands Alan the radio back. “Lance, can you spare some clothes? I can’t remember the key code to get into my apartment - I’m never there.”

“Sure, Cap’n, no problem. Right this way.”

“You all hear that?” Camille says as she shuts off her radio. “They have some sort of plan in motion.”

“I knew it!” Shannon says as she begins to pace. “I knew they wouldn’t just sit around and let us get away with this. So wherever Alan is, Keith is with him...and Dexter is waiting for Keith to give the go-ahead signal. So if we can get to Keith before he signals Dexter, we’ve got him.”

“That means we have two places to cover,” Tasia says. “Alan’s room and Keith’s. He’s probably going to choose the one that’s closest.”

Shannon snaps her fingers. “You’re right. We’ll have to ambush them when they come out of the apartment.”

“That’s too late,” Desi says. “Keith will probably signal Dexter to move as soon as he gets some clothes on.”

“Then we have to go after him now, and we also have to relocate Allura. The others might try to get her while we’re chasing after Keith. Caro, how about your place?”

“Ay,” Caro says. “She can hide in the bedroom. Everything’s unpacked there.”

“Good. Camille, you keep that channel open. Tasia, get the buzz gun and let’s go.”

Keith pokes his head through the neck of the shirt, tugs it into place and works his hair free. “There. Now I don’t feel so naked.”

“That’s because you’re not so naked anymore, Cap’n.” I grin at him. “Now how about an explanation for that chocolate syrup residue on your stomach?”

“I have to admit that I’m curious about it too,” Alan says. “Especially since the one who used the syrup and the one who took the towel are two separate people, according to what you told us earlier. That implies that you may have been experiencing every man’s dream.”

“Alan, you’re right! That thought didn’t even occur to me. There could be more to our good Captain that what appears on the surface.”

Keith makes a face. “All right you two, just drop it. We have to get moving before the ladies decide on another attack plan.”

“You mean like maybe a trio or a quartet?” Alan asks.

Keith grinds his teeth. “Knock it off and let’s go. I want to talk to Dexter about planning our next move.”

“Don’t sweat it, Alan. We can grill him later. Take point.”

Alan nods and takes a quick peek through the eyehole before giving an all clear and opening the door. To my surprise, he’s suddenly snatched out of sight for a second time. I hear the clunk of his weapon hitting the floor and the sounds of a struggle. I burst into the hall with Keith right behind me. This time it’s the gals wrestling with Alan, but he doesn’t look so put out about it. I let rip with my water gun and hose down three of his would-be attackers. Keith snatches up Alan’s gun and add to the barrage of defensive water fire. The girls quickly retreat from their fallen quarry amid shrieks of alarm and Alan recovers quickly, but Tasia presses forward with a laser pistol in her hand. Keith turns pale.

“It’s the buzz gun!” He cries. “Move it, retreat!”

“What?” I snap my head around to see Keith fleeing for his life. Tasia takes aim at him, and I douse her with water at the exact same time. She flinches, then cusses as her shot goes wide and Keith gets through the door. She points the pistol at me and fires. I attempt to dodge but the bluish beam strikes me in the hip. My leg goes completely numb and I hit the floor. Alan snatches up my water gun and attempts to defend me. Tasia takes aim a second time. He splatters her right in the boobs and she drops the gun to rub at the water that’s splashed into her eyes. Camille goes for the buzz weapon. “Alan, go!” I yell at him. “Cover the Captain! Do it!”

Alan realizes that he can’t hold his position any longer. He gives me a look of sympathy as he dashes off after Keith. Camille gives chase and gets sprayed as she flings the door to the stairwell open. She shrieks and jumps back, then she starts for the door again. Tasia calls her back and the girls gather around me in a semi-circle.

“Keith got away again,” Desiree sighs.

“He’ll be back,” Tasia replies, “because one, he wants to take Allura back to the castle, and two, we have his buddy here as our hostage.” She smiles sweetly at me and nudges my leg with her bare foot, not that I can feel it. “I think we should interrogate him to get Dexter’s full battle plan. Take him away, girls.”

“See any activity up there, Dunny?”

“No, nae a bit. Hasn’t been any since they all left th’ - wait, one o’ them just passed by th’ livin’ room window. An’ there’s another one. Looks like they’re all comin’ back from wherever they got to.”

“Any sign of the princess?”

“No.”

The sound of running feet comes from the far end of the fence. We look that way in time to see Keith fling the gate open and run around the edge of the swimming pool toward us, with Alan a close second. They reach our position and come to a breathless halt. Dunkirk arches a brow at me. I shrug back.

“Chief...? What happened?”

“Ambush...Lance down...got away...” He draws a deep, shuddering breath. “Where’s Dexter?”

“He’s holdin’ a position at th’ elevators in th’ lobby,” Dunkirk replies.

“What about Pidge and Galen? Where are they?”

“They should be on the fifth floor by now,” Alan says. “They were supposed to cover one stairwell while Lance and I covered the other.”

“So they’re still in position...okay. In the meantime, we have a problem. We have to -”

“Yoo-hoo, Cap’n Keithie!” Tasia calls from a balcony above us. We look up to see her standing there with Lance on her right, handcuffed and held in place by Desiree and Shannon. “Lookie what I got! Wanna trade?”

“Don’t do it, Keith,” Lance says. “So I’m here in handcuffs surrounded by a bunch of girls in lingerie. It’s not that bad, actually.”

Tasia nods to the girls, and they both begin to tickle Lance at once. He struggles, squirms and yelps as he tries to get away from them. “Okay, okay, it’s bad now! Help, get me outta here! Help!” The girls stop tickling and he pouts at them.

“Take your time deciding whether or not to surrender, Keithie-boy,” Tasia says. “But your friend here will be tickle-tortured at regular intervals of fifteen minutes while you delay. Talk to you later.”

“Wait!” Keith yells up to her. “I surrender...but these are my terms. You bring Lance down here, and he gets released to the guys at the same time as I come over to your side.”

Tasia and Shannon get their heads together for a moment, then Shannon comes to the railing. “All right, Keith, it’s a deal. But we want all the guys down there where we can see them. If there’s anyone missing other than Lance, the swap is off. Understand?”

“Understood,” Keith replies. “Alan, get in touch with the others and tell them to withdraw.” He looks back up at the balcony. “When do we start?”

“We’ll be down in ten minutes,” Shannon says. “See you then.” They retreat back inside with their captive. I look at Keith.

“Chief, what the heck are you doing? You can’t just give in like that!”

“Don’t sweat it, Hunk. I have a plan.” He walks over to a heavy, flat hose secured beside a small shed housing all the maintenance tools for the swimming pool. “This’ll do nicely for what we need. Now come over here so we can work out the details.”

“Okay, let’s get ready to take the hostage down for the swap.” Shannon slides the glass doors shut, guides me over to the couch and sits me down on it. “Tasia, give me the buzz gun and I’ll keep an eye on the prisoner while you all get dressed. I’ll take my turn last.”

Tasia looks concerned as she hands the pistol over. “Keith surrendered just a little too quick for my taste, Shanny. He’s got a idea cookin’ in that head of his, I just know it.”

“Maybe we ought to do some recon of our own, then.”

“Sure. Soon as I dry off and change, I’m outtie.” She leaves the room with the rest of the girls. Shannon smiles at me. “Looks like we’ll still have the drop on you and your buddies, Lance.”

“Enjoy your little victory while you can,” I tell her. “We may have lost the battles so far, but the war isn’t over yet.”

“We’ll just have to see about that,” her smile turns devilish. “Unless Keith can come up with a really good plan for rescuing you and escaping as well, he’s likely to get chocolate-covered before the evening’s out.”

“Tell me it’s Allura that’s planning to do it.”

“Yes, she certainly is.”

“I knew it, I knew it! She made an attempt already, didn’t she?”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“And she was talking about dessert toppings this afternoon at lunch, right?”

“Correct on all counts.”

“Heh, Keith - you are so busted.” I settle back on the couch with a satisfied smile. Shannon looks confused.

“What are you so happy about?”

“I’m happy because I was right all along. It doesn’t matter what happens now.” I shrug and grin at her.

“Is that so?”

“Yep.”

“You are so funny, Lance.”

“Yeah, but I’m good-looking.”

“I agree.” She gives me a quick once-over. “I should have told Keith we wouldn’t be down until much later. There’s not a whole lot I can get away with in less than ten minutes.” She runs a palm over my stomach, then she tickles me. “Maybe next time it’ll be you that gets dragged off and chocolate-coated.”

“Maybe I won’t put up a fuss over it,” I reply, and then it hits me. Here I am in handcuffs, sitting on a couch with my favorite sexy blonde, and I want to leave? Am I stupid or what? No, it’s all a matter of pride here. Have to see it through.

Tasia and the rest of the girls return, dressed in a variety of T-shirts and jeans. Shannon gets up from the couch and hands the buzz gun back to Tasia, then she goes to make a quick change herself.

“What’s the plan, Shan?” Tasia asks when she returns.

“Just take a roundabout way to the pool and try to get into a position somewhere behind them. Any funny business occurs during the swap, you let them have it.”

“Got it.” Tasia salutes and leaves. Shannon and Lynne hook my arms and pull me up from the couch.

To Allura's New Groove: Part 11

To Allura's New Groove: Part 13