OPERATION CHEESECAKE - PART 3

Dunkirk really must sneak around with Hunk through the castle a lot. He slips quickly and quietly along the lesser-traveled halls, silent as a shadow. Then he goes to the northeast tower to use one of the elevators there. It’s seldom used by anyone but the tech and support people. Because of that he doesn’t have to wait long at all for it to arrive on our floor and he’s down to sub level three within a few minutes.

The hall is deserted, but he moves with great caution anyway until he finally reaches the door. He types in the access code - another sign he’s swapped notes with Hunk, since Hunk is one of the few who actually remembers it - and slips inside. He flicks on the light, surveys the area carefully.

This vault has become the repository for all the random junk that has long since lost its usefulness but Allura simply doesn’t have the heart to throw out. In the far corner sits the battered puppet booth we made to entertain the children of a local orphanage months ago. Dunkirk chooses it as my hiding place, walking over to drag it aside, kick a few dusty but soft stuffed animals behind it and put me in place. He seems genuinely apologetic as he gives me a look before he turns to leave.

“Ye know, I donna really like t’ be doin’ this t’ ye, Keith, but...it is cheesecake an’ all. I’m sure ye understand.” His mouth twists into a frown. “An’ Tasia...she’s just a wee bit steamed up over how we’ve never gotten any packed with our picnic meal like th’ rest o’ ye do. I think she’ll calm down after a bit, then it’ll all be fine.”

He shifts the booth back in place, and I hear his footsteps recede into distance. My mind immediately starts doing the math. If they’ve never gotten cheesecake for a picnic since the time they arrived, and they’ve been here for over a year...

Holy cow. No wonder Tasia’s out to kill. But I don’t understand how they’d miss out. Nanny must have provided them with a selection list at the very beginning so they could choose exactly what sort of things they wanted included in the basket. A mistake in filling in the form, maybe? A mistyped entry in the database? Pidge playing around in the system as a joke?

Whatever it may be, it has to be cleared up, and soon. I don’t want to see anything like this happen again. On the other hand, Lance being hosed down with Nanny’s favorite perfume is a really funny idea. Wonder why I never thought of it.

While I’ve only been living in the castle for a little more than a year, Hunk has been a resident for nearly five. It shows in the way he zips through the hallways as he works his way toward the castle elevators in the southeast tower. The only reason I know where he’s going is from many evenings of stubborn determination to memorize the layout - well, at least all of the important places I needed to go, anyway.

The southeast tower doesn’t get a lot of traffic at this time of day since the servants who usually access them are busy doing their daily chores. Things won’t get complicated until the shift change. So Hunk doesn’t get any surprises when he takes an elevator down to sub-level three. He goes to the vault (I don’t know why it’s called that since there’s no heavy steel doors, no double or triple security measures; it’s a just a big, big room to store junk in), unlocks the door, goes in.

The area is a literal sprawl of semi-useful debris. Props left over from shows performed for orphanage children, lots of giant stuffed animals given to Princess Allura as birthday gifts (only the really, really goofy ones though, like the oversized purple pig in a yellow tutu and the octopus with a miner’s hat on - all the other things get donated to charity), old furniture, large trunks full of clothing. Hunk starts toward a puppet booth in the far corner, but stops again halfway, seeming to change his mind.

“Nahh - too obvious,” he mutters. I wind up on a blanket behind a stack of three steamer trunks. Hunk pauses to look at me before he moves the stuffed pig into place.

“Look Dex, it’s nothing personal, ya know? But thanks to Tasia we’re gonna miss our fishing time, and Lance snagging himself with a fishhook is a time-honored ritual. You ever read Charlie Brown comics?”

I shake my head ‘no’ at him.

“Well, there’s kid named Charlie Brown, and this girl named Lucy, and she’s got this football, see, and she always yanks it away when Charlie Brown goes to kick it. But she still tricks him into trying it every time, and every time she yanks it away. That’s how it is with Lance, kinda. Every time he goes fishing, he yells ‘hey team, watch this cast!’ and he gets the fishhook stuck. But the next time we go on a picnic, he’s right back at it again. See what I mean?”

I nod at him then.

“Besides, Tasia’s threatening the cheesecake. Can’t let her get away with that one, whether we miss Lance snagging his butt or not.” He steps back, rests the pig against the end of the trunks to conceal me from view, then I hear him retreat to the door. The lights go out then, leaving me in darkness.

“Hold still, Alan, you’re making me smear it!” Tasia gets another fingerful of face paint and draws a wide swath of pale blue-gray across Alan’s left cheek.

“It’s camouflage. It doesn’t matter if it smears.”

“Yes it does, be quiet.” She finishes the application, then steps back to admire her handiwork. “All done, guys. We ready?”

I look everyone over. It was tough trying to find a technician’s jumpsuit that Galen didn’t drown in, but I came pretty close. I look at Tasia.

“All good t’ go,” I say to her. “But what do we need th’ backpack for?”

“That, my dear Dunkirk, is for the Coup de Grace.” She holds up a thick, bulky dress. I blink at it.

“Tasia, I know that’s not one belongin’ ‘t ye.”

“Nope, this is one of Nanny’s dresses. I got it out of the laundry room. I think Lance will look really good in it. We’re gonna put this in the backpack.”

“An’ how are ye plannin’ t’ dress Lance up in that?”

“Simple. We’ll capture the remaining members of Team One, and I’ll demand the location of the blueberry cheesecake from Lance. If he doesn’t cough it up, then we hose down each of his buddies, one by one. If he still doesn’t cave, I threaten to dress him up in this. That’ll break him for sure.”

“Aye, I daresay I’d have t’ agree with that.”

“Say, Tasia,” Galen says. “I just thought of something. If they’ve got everything packed up and ready for the picnic, wouldn’t the cheesecake be out in whatever vehicle they’re using to go to the lake?”

Tasia’s expression brightens. “That’s it - we head for the vehicle bay, raid the van, then double back and work them all over anyway for what they threatened to do to the Captain. Then we get both revenge, and the cheesecake to celebrate it with.” A wicked smile plays across her lips. “Lance, you are mine, baby.”

“And what about this,” Galen adds. “Remember how Keith said Nanny wasn’t storing the cheesecake in a obvious place? Cheesecake is a dessert, and it has to be kept chilled for the most part. So all we would have to do is check out any refrigerated, non- dessert storage. That would narrow our choices down.”

Tasia beams at him. “Galen, you wonderful fellow, you. You are da man.”

Galen grins. “Thanks.”

“Change in attack plan, team,” Tasia says. “We go to the kitchen first, search and recover the one and a half cheesecakes there. Then we head to the vehicle bay to capture the other one, and lastly, we circle around to deal with Lance and his buddies.” She hands me the dress and I stuff it into the backpack. “Team, to the kitchen!”

“Wait,” Galen says. “We’ll need something to clear the area out with. Mice won’t work, since everyone’s used to them running around...but I still have the rubber snake I won at the carnival last year. We can use that.”

“All righty then,” Tasia replies. “Let’s go!”

Okay, have to get back to the sitting room to see what Lance has in store while we wait for Team Two to let Keith go. He’s gotta put some sort of defensive strategy in place in case they try to grab one of us to make a two for one trade. Come to think of it, under these conditions it’s not too bright for me to be wandering the halls alone...

Nahh, no problem. I’m bigger than any of them except Dunny, and they’ll probably leave him behind to keep an eye on Keith, wherever he’s being held. That leaves Alan, Tasia and squirt number two to deal with. Shouldn’t be too big of a deal.

I round a corner and see a light coming out of a storage room up ahead. It’s not one that’s used too much - wonder if...

I slow my steps to sneak up quietly. As I get close I can hear Tasia speaking.

“That’s it - we head for the vehicle bay, raid the van, then double back and work them all over anyway for what they threatened to do to the Captain. Then we get both revenge, and the cheesecake to celebrate it with. Lance, you are mine, baby.”

I sneak a peek around the edge of the door. Team Two is all dressed up in technician jumpsuits with their faces painted in camouflage blue-gray. Tasia has her dark hair tied back under a matching scarf. In the darker hallways they’d be nearly invisible. Uh-oh...

“And what about this,” I hear Galen say. “Remember how Keith said Nanny wasn’t storing the cheesecake in a obvious place? Cheesecake is a dessert, and it has to be kept chilled for the most part. So all we would have to do is check out any refrigerated, non-dessert storage. That would narrow our choices down.”

Tasia smiles at Galen. “Galen, you wonderful fellow, you. You are da man.”

Galen grins back at her. “Thanks.”

“Change in attack plan, team,” Tasia says. “We go to the kitchen first, search and recover the one and a half cheesecakes there. Then we head to the vehicle bay to capture the other one, and lastly, we circle around to deal with Lance and his buddies.” She hands Dunkirk a really large dress that he folds up to put into a backpack he has.

“Team,” Tasia says, “to the kitchen!”

I jump back from the doorway and dash back down the hall to hide behind the corner there. Since they’re heading for the kitchen area, they’ll be turning in the opposite direction. I hazard a peek at them as they go. They’re debating on which cheesecake will taste the best as head for the stairs.

A raid, and then an ambush? Holy cow, I gotta warn the rest of the team!

I turn and run back the way that I came.

To Operation Cheesecake: Part 2

To Operation Cheesecake: Part 4